how little are we
to think we should see
past what is there
and past what is not
but really who cares?
if we could all just live and be
then you’d be able to see
that there’s nothing even there
but that’s okay..
it’s okay to just live
to just be
to give without expecting to get
to forgive and to forget
life could be this easy
if you’d only let it.
when i’m wrapped tight in my covers
hearing the rain and thunder
all alone here at night
i can’t help but wonder,
do you still see me
in everything you do
do you still think of me
like i think of you
can you hear my voice aloud
when no one is around
can you feel me talking to you
whenever you’re feeling down
do you still smile when your sad
just to make me feel i helped
and are you still blaming me
cause i know i blame myself
do you still think of us together
when you start to feel lonely
and do you remember when forever
was more than a memory
you’re in every second of every day
i still can’t let you go
and when i try and push you farther
things just get harder
and will you remember me
like i remember you
because i can’t help wondering
if you still think of me
like i think of you.
i feel too alive to shut my eyes
the darkness is nearing
a subtle clearing in the back of my mind
one of which space time and matter
do not matter at all
because right here in this moment
i fear we all may know it
that eventually the sun will seize to rise
and in that second our eyes will glimmer
with the whiteness of a winter that has all but passed us by
and as the snow weeps from the sun’s gentle heat
we’ll feel the snows cry that’ll continue to seep into our minds
because all we will find is the emptiness of our hearts
that’s been trying to fill as it’s ripping us apart
and what’s really there, was never there at all
i wish life was fair, but that’s not really my call
so let us take what we deserve
and reserve what should be coming
because i keep on running around this endless curve
that ends up circling me right back down from my perfect world.
these lonely nights
they keep me awake
i’m trying to sleep
but can’t concentrate
my thoughts they race
as i face my fears
that i could be alone
for the rest of my years
i’m scared of what’s there
and not the unknown
i fear that my heart
would be left alone
and i’ll be on my own
to live life’s endeavor
i’m afraid that this strife
could last forever
and the past it’s haunting
so i’ll hide in my dreams
where no one can see me
because these nights, they’re so lonely
i just want to fall asleep.
you’re a train wreck i tried slowing down
you pushed me harder and harder into the ground
until that one simple day
that you took it all away
i tried stopping you, but you wouldn’t slow down
i’m trying hard now not to look back
but each time i come close
to even look behind, i find myself falling off track
it’s getting hard now and you wouldn”t even mind
you sent me away and easily let go
don’t pretend now, you didn’t let me down slow
it’s over now and you don’t even care
i try harder and harder to go my on way
but no matter where, you’re always there
and i try but it’ll never be okay
i keep trying pushing myself away
now you think over is over
but trying telling me sober
i keep slowly drifting back your way
i’m lost and rambling to you
into an absent scrambling
dark distant blue
but it all comes around
to this lonely ground
we’re all dying alone
and there’s nothing you can do
alone will happen to you.
sometimes i just want to scream
yet now i find you trying to hide
but how i’ve tried and you’re still lost
because you’re but in a dream,
and until you can break free
of what seems to be eternity
you’ll never be who i knew you once were
because you were my dream
too good to be my ideal girl, my dream girl.
open eyes.
real world.
polar lives.
nothing’s right.
never again will i get to hold her
that girl i came to know, my life, my love
my lover.
what is time? I’ve always wondered. how can you measure time when we don’t know exactly what time is or where it came from if it indeed began at all? to have time we’d have to have a beginning, which means there had to be a time before time, with no time. it’s conceivable, to me, that time just isn’t real. does time travel? did the universe create time or time create the universe? is the universe just suspended in what we perceive is time? just because we can go so far back, and put a time system on everything, doesn’t mean that everything wouldn’t still be here if time didn’t exist. the decay of us, the world, the universe isn’t based on there being time, merely how we time it.
now here i am, still thinking of you
it’s not that i’m regretting,
i just didn’t know what to do
so here i go, i’ve tried forgetting
but i haven’t gotten far from letting go
who would’ve known,
a line from a song
could’ve brought me back so long ago
well here goes nothing
something i’m not use to
i’m trying not lose,
trying not to lose you.
just kind of threw this together in a hurry
when i open my eyes
and come back in to your world
no surprise it hasn’t changed
just rearranged, still out of order
but when i close my eyes
i can do anything
so i’m leaving, i’m leaving tonight
to a place you’ll never find
so miraculously seen, to me
yet i’ll see you in another time
so don’t wake me from this dream.
an old one i didn’t want to put up, but now it doesn’t really matter
I’m tired of being the glue
that holds together you and i
whether or not you realize
this demise rests on you
you weren’t ever there for me
never what i needed
yet i couldn’t see past
the fact i thought i was completed
you should’ve known this couldn’t last
one sided, empty seated
based on lust, lies, and secrecy
you were never there until you needed me
until you were down and depleted
well now i need you, so where are you
where are you now…
time after time, day after day
the way my heart races
is unlike anything
the way i melt in your eyes
and know how everything is right
because love at first sight
is a magical thing
everything we’ve been through
both practical and perceptible
show the real truth
that all roads lead me back to you
you’re all i’ve ever needed
what keeps my heart beating
it’s unlike anything
the way i felt when i knew
that you were that perfect girl
because you and i on top of the world
it’s a magical thing
this love, this is real
finally a tangible feeling
when all along we both really knew
that all roads lead me back to you
as the sound of silence starts to fill my head
i find myself missing your voice, all you’ve ever said
you said i had a choice, but you chose instead
i lose myself inside you
your eyes, your smile, your mind
i find that me without you
is like leaving myself behind
our paths keep on colliding
as if fate can’t keep us apart
it’s always been you i’ve tried finding
such a simple addiction to your complex heart
you’re what i’ve come to look for
more than i’ve ever found in a girl
i had lost myself before
now here i stand, not so alone to the world
not so alone inside me
and now you make me feel so new, so strong
like i’ve finally found my missing piece
it’s always been you, it’s been you all along.
